A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’S DREAM




About Shakespeare.

Первые выходят девочки – Miss Books и Sister, Little Spitfire и Lovely. У Miss Books книга. Sister приносит простыню. Девочки рассматривают книгу, играют с простыней и садятся в кружок.

Заходят хулиганы – Heckler и Bully.

Miss Books: Hey, what are you doing here?

Sister: It’s a party only for girls.

Little Spitfire: Get out of here.

Lovely: Get away, please.

Мальчики вначале уходят, но потом потихоньку возвращаются.

Заходят Brother и Security

Brother: Hallo, girls. What’s this?

Little Spitfire: No, what’s this?

Sister: This is my brother. I will tell mommy you disturb us.

Brother: Go ahead. What’s this? (держит вверх ногами и пытается прочитать)

Miss Books: William Shakespeare. Plays.

Security: (Переворачивает книгу) William Shakespeare. Plays.

Brother: My name is George. What’s your name?

Miss Books: My name is Alex. It’s nice to meet you.

Brother: It’s nice to meet you.

Security: May we stay?

Miss Books: You may.

Sister: And what about only-for-girls-party?

Miss Books: For girls, George and...what’s your name?

Security: Kirill.

Miss Books: And Kirill.

Заходят Merry-maker и Chemist.

Merry-maker и Chemist: And Merry-man and Chemist.

Merry-maker: What are you talking about?

Lovely: About Shakespeare.

Merryman: Is it a chocolate?

Chemist: Or pills?

Heckler: Pain pills

Bully: You take.

Miss Books: We will read plays and play them.

Hecklers: Oh, you are an actress.

Little Spitfire: It’s none of your business.

Heckler: And I am an actor.

Sister: Not less than DiCaprio.

Brother: We will read plays and play them. And you. And you.

Sister: But obey the story-teller. (Но слушайтесь рассказчика.)

Security: That’s great.

TAMING OF THE SHREW

Brother: I want to tell a play. About

Danila: taming of the shrew.

Brother: Thank you, Danila. Taming of the Shrew.

Sister: What do you mean? The shrew!

Brother: Nothing. Once there was a girl, named

Danila: Katherine.

Brother: Katherine.

Little Spitfire: She was a complete shrew. See?
Sister: I will not be this Katherine. I will tell daddy you are cheating me. See?

Brother: Without any doubts. You will be the shrew. I am the author.

Sister: I am also the author. You will be the shrew. Your name is…

Danila: Katherine!

Brother: Thank you, Danila. Katherine. Your father is a rich and noble man,

Miss Books: but nobody wants to marry you/

Bully: because you are willful and just nasty.

Brother: (ударяет по плечу) I didn’t understand. Where is Auch!

Together: Yes, where is auch?

Brother: Come down. And you have a younger sister.

Sister: Ok, where is my sister?

Lovely: It’s me!

Merry-man: She is perfect.

Danila: She has a sweet nature.

Sister: Your name is…

Danila: Bianca.

Sister: Thank you, Danila. Your name is Bianca.

Miss Books: Everybody wants to marry her.

Sister: Not you.

Chemist: But their father Baptista forbids Bianca to marry.

Lovely: Why?

Chemist: Until Katherina is wed.

Merry-maker: Let’s find a husband for her, guys.

Miss Books: And who are you?

Together: Yes, who are you?

Merry-maker: Lucentio

Sister: Don’t pay attention. He falls in love with Bianca.

Ищут жениха для Катарины.

Brother (находит решение): In the meantime, Petruchio, accompanied by his servant Grumio, arrives in Padua from Verona. Merry-maker: Hey, guys. Would you like to tame the shrew?

Heckler: With pleasure.

Sister: Who wants to be Petruchio?

Heckler и Bully: Petruchio, is it a name?

Достает с удивлением из книги красное покрывало. Это плащ Петруччо.

Sister: It’s for Petruchio.

Chemist: I want to be Petrucio.

Sister: No, you are Baptista.

Merry-maker: Friends, help us. And present me to her father as a music tutor.

Heckler: No problem. Baptista, he is a music tutor.

Baptista: All right.

Bully: And how should I help you?

Вместе: Marry her!

Bully: Marry her?

Heckler: Break!

Bully: Would you marry me?

Little Spitfire: No.

Bully: What a surprise!

Sister: Pretend that any harsh things she says or does are actually kind and gentle. See? (Притворись, что все грубые вещи, которые она говорит на самом деле добрые и мягкие)

Little Spitfire: A fool.

Bully: Oh, thank you.

Little Spitfire: A wet blanket.

Bully: You are so kind.

Вместе: Marry him.

Little Spitfire: All right!

Chemist: I declare you a husband and a wife.

Miss Books: After the wedding, Petruchio takes Katherina to his home against her will.

Brother: In Verona, Petruchio begins the "taming" of his new wife. Go ahead.

Bully: Oh, some say my Ket is limping. Oh, evil people! (Некоторые говорят, что мой котик хромает. О злые люди!)

Sister: Oh, I have an idea. Petrucio, you’ll like it. She is refused food and clothing

Brother: because nothing – according to Petruchio – is good enough for her. (потому что ничего – по мнению Петруччо – не достаточно хорошо для нее)

Merry-maker: Lucencio, I have an idea. He claims perfectly cooked meat is overcooked, (он заявляет, что идеально приготовленное мясо недожарено)

Chemist: Lucencio?

Merry-man: What?

Chemist: You are in my black list.

Merry-man: I see, Baptista.

Lovely: I have an idea. A beautiful dress doesn't fit right, (прекрасное платье не подходит по размеру)

Miss Books: and a stylish hat is not fashionable. (а модная шляпка не модная)

Heckler: He also disagrees with everything she says (он также не соглашается со всем, что она говорит), Bully: forcing her to agree with everything he says (заставляя ее соглашаться, со всем, что он говорит), Heckler и Bully вместе: no matter how absurd (неважно на сколько это абсурдно);

Danila: Boys, you are boys.

Bully: My dear lady, this is the moon shine at us.

Little Spitfire: What? This is…

Sister: She agrees with Petruchio that the sun is the moon.

Little Spitfire: As you wish. This sun is not a sun actually.

Bully: And what is this?

Little Spitfire: It goes without saying, this is the moon.

Bully: You yourself are the moon. The sun is shining. Brightly.

Little Spitfire: Oh, if you please to call it a candle, it shall be so for me" (ой, если тебе захочется назвать его свечкой, это будет так и для меня)

Bully: Oh, look at the old lady. Let’s help her. (пойдем в зал)

Little Spitfire: Of coarse, let’s help. How do you do, my lady?

Bully: Are you mad? This is a man.

Little Spitfire: Oh, I am sorry. Of coarse, a man. No doubts.

Merry-maker: Lucentio marries Bianca.

Brother: All right. Are you successful in tamining the shrew?

Bully: Let’s see. My dear wife, come to me.

Little Spitfire: I don’t come to…Oh, I have other business to do. Without running to and fro.

Sister: Ah, what did you say?

Bully: Oh, evil people say that my Ket is limping…

Little Spitfire: All right.

Miss Books: how successfully Petruchio has tamed the shrew.

HAMLET

Little Spitfire: Now, I will tell a play. About…

Danila: Hamlet, Prince of Denmark.

Brother: Hamlet, the Prince of DenMerry-man.

Little Spitfire: Yes, Hamlet. Prince of Denmark.

Miss Books: Oh, I know the story. On a dark winter night

Merry-man: Aaaaaaaaaaa

Chemist: Lucencio. Enough.

Lovely: A ghost!

Merry-man: Me?

Bully: appeared in Elsinore Castle in Denmark.

Miss Books: The ghost resembles the recently deceased King,

Little Spitfire: Whose brother Claudius

Heckler: Brother!

Little Spitfire: Has inherited the throne

Heckler: Indeed?

Little Spitfire: Indeed.

Heckler: Get away.

Little Spitfire: And married the king’s widow, Queen Gertrude.

Miss Books: Then the ghost declares to Prince Hamlet.

Lovely: Prince Hamlet? Where is Prince Hamlet? Are you Prince Hamlet?

Merry-man: Bianca, I am Lucencio.

Lovely: Are you Prince Hamlet?

Security: No, no, I am the evil wind.

Lovely: I love him.

Merry-man: I was murdered by none other than Claudius.

Da-da-da-dam

Brother: I suspected that.
Heckler: It was not me!

Sister: Are you sure?

Heckler: Of course.

Merry-man: Revenge, my son.

Brother: Sure, Daddy.

Miss Books: Prince Hamlet makes up his mind to revenge.

Brother: An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.

Little Spitfire: But he becomes a bit mad.

Brother: What did you say, my sweetest?

Little Spitfire: It is not me! It is Shakespeare! He even orders Ophelia. Ophelia, come here.

Lovely: His bride.

Little Spitfire: Yes, his bride. He says her to enter a nunnery and declares that he wants to ban marriages.

Hamlet: Enter a nunnery.

Little Spitfire: And ban marriages.

Brother: And ban marriages.

Chemist: Who cares for him? Oh, come on, my dear daughter, let’s find a better guy. This one!

Lovely: This is my brother!

Chemist: Hallo, son.

Bully: Hallo, Daddy.

Miss Books: And he kills her brother.

Bully: What did he do?

Hamlet: Take it easy, man.

Bully: Bye, Daddy.

Chemist: Bye, Son.

Chemist: I said he is not for you.

Hamlet: Dead!

Hamlet: I can't get to sleep
I think about the implications
Lovely: Of diving in too deep
Chemist: And possibly the complications

Hamlet: Especially at night
I worry over situations
Sister: You know you'll be alright
Heckler: Perhaps it's just imagination

Hamlet: Day after day it reappears
Heckler: Night after night my heartbeat shows the fear
Merry-man and Security: Ghosts appear and fade away

Everybody: Come back another day.

Little Spitfire: Ophelia goes mad with grief and drowns in the river.

Miss Books: Then Claudius kills Hamlet.

Little Spitfire: But before that Hamlet kills Claudius.

Miss Books: But before that Queen Gertrude is poisoned by Claudius.

Little Spitfire: The wind quiets down. What are we going to do?

Miss Books: Oh, may I ask you...

Chemist: No problem.

NIGHT

Merry-man: I am tired усталый of the tragedies. Let’s read a comedy.

Chemist: Lucencio,

Merry-man: What?

Chemist: sounds great. (Люсенсио отбирает книгу у Устины, начинает ее листать, искать комедию) Any of them. Oh, the 12th night.

Merry-man: Ok. We need the main characters. Baptista. Нам нужны главные персонажи.

Chemist: What?

Merry-man: You choose.

Chemist: Oh, thank you, Lucencio. You and you.

Merry-man: Not this one. Get away, Claudius.

Chemist: All right. You.

Все с удивлением осматривают брата и сестру. Они очень похожи.

Merry-man: Can you see that? Вы это видите?

Everybody: Like two peas.

Merry-man: Are you relatives? Вы что, родственники?

Brother and Sister: Yes.

Chemist: Two sisters.

Security and Sister: A brother and a sister.

Merry-man: Your name is Patricio?

Chemist: And who is the brother?

Security: I am the brother.

Merry-man: Take it easy, man. Не воспринимай серьезно.

Bully: We need the intrigue!

Chemist: The tempest? Everybody: The tempest!

Brother: Are you sure it is a comedy? А вы уверены, что это комедия?

Chemist: Don’t worry. Well, the sea takes Sebastian away.

Sister: Goodbye.

Brother: I am Sebastian.

Sister: Goodbye, Sebastian.

Security: Viola is heartbroken.

Bully: Baby girl.

Little Spitfire: You are in Illiria, my lady.

Brother: Probably in Verona?

Little Spitfire: No, in Illiria.

Sister: Thank you.

Little Spitfire: Welcome.

Sister: What should I do in Illiria? My brother is in Elisium. Who governs here? Кто здесь правит?

Heckler: Who governs here? Who governs here? The handsome man.

Merry-man: I am the handsome man.

Sister: So, it is you, isn’t it?

Люченцио пишет в книге, что в 12 ночи, он самый привлекательный, а не Слава.

Lovely: A noble duke, my lady.

Sister: Thank you.

Lovely: You are welcome.

Sister: What is his name?

Heckler: Orsino.

Sister: Orsino. I have never heard this name!

Lovely: He is a bachelor, my lady.

Sister: Thank you.

Lovely: You are welcome.

Miss Books: But he loves me.

Sister: What’s she?

Merry-man: Olivia.

Little Spitfire: The daughter of a count, my lady.

Sister: Thank you.

Little Spitfire: Welcome.

Sister: Oh, I will serve this lady.

Miss Books: No, I don’t need you.

Sister: Probably I will serve this Duke.

Heckler: I don’t need girls.

Merry-man: Quite! An interesting idea. How? Тихо! Интересная идея! Как?

Sister: That’s a question.

Chemist: Don’t worry. Guys…

Everybody: What?

Chemist: Turn around.

Everybody: No.

Chemist: Guys…

Everybody: What?

Chemist: The Moon!

Everybody: Wow.
Переодевают Виолу.

Chemist: Take the skirt off.

Sister: Baptista…you become bit mad.

Merry-man: No, he is right.

Brother: Hey, what about me? (забирает себе вторую юбку)

Chemist: Guys!

Everybody: What?

Chemist: The sun is shining. Солнце светит.

Everybody: AAAAAAAA

Chemist: Guys…

Everybody: What?

Chemist&Merry-man: A boy!

Все смотрят с подозрением, Орсино ходит и рассматривает. Chemist, Merry-maker и Виола боятся, что их обман раскроют.

Heckler: A pretty boy. (выдыхают) Looks like a girl. (снова напрягаются) What is your name?

Sister: My name is Viola.

Chemist: His name is Cezario.

Heckler: A good guy. Come with me.

Merry-man: Then Orsino sends Cezario to tell Olivia about his passionate love. Затем Орсино посылает Цезарио рассказать Оливии о его страстной любви.

Heckler: Go to that woman, my dearest, and tell her about my passionate love.

Sister: He loves you.

Miss Books: I know.

Chemist: And Viola loves Duke Orsino.

Sister: This one?

Merry-man: Olivia, however, falls in love with 'Cesario'. Оливия, однако, влюбляется в Цезарио.

Security, Little Spitfire: Olivia's uncle, Sir Toby Belch and Mary, Olivia’s servant, are mocking at her. Насмехаются над ней.

Security, Little Spitfire: Oh inner city streets
Where you sleep
Heckler: I watched her take this romance
Home to me
Oh
Sister: I believe in something more
Merry-man ana Chemist: I watched her heart
Through bathroom doors
Sister: It's true
Everybody: Eyes that are older than you
Miss Books: Oh echoes in the heart
When we meet
Sister: I chose to take this moment
To tell you I'm leaving
Oh
Miss Books: I believe in something more
Everybody: I watched her heart
Through bathroom doors
It's true
Eyes that are older than you

Chemist: Guys…

Everybody: What?

Chemist: Turn around.

Everybody: No.

Chemist: Guys…

Everybody: What?

Chemist: The Sun!

Everybody: Wow.

 

Merry-man: Meanwhile, Sebastian. He is…В это время, Себастьян, он…Lovely просыпается и говорит: He is in depression!

Merry-man: He is alife

Chemist: Hey, you. The sun!

Lovely: Wow!

Merry-man: Arrives to Illyria. Приьывает в Иллирию.

Brother: Probably to Verona?

Merry-man: No, to Illyria.

Merry-man and Chemist: Gotta make a move to a
Town that's right for me
Brother: Town to keep me movin'
Keep me groovin' with some energy

Lovely: Well, I talk about it
Talk about it
Talk about it
Talk about it
Little Spitfire: Talk about, Talk about
Talk about movin

Heckler: Gotta move on
Gotta move on
Brother: Gotta move on

Miss Books: Won't you take me to
Funkytown
Won't you take me to
Funkytown
Everybody: Won't you take me to
Funkytown
Won't you take me to
Funkytown

Miss Books: Marry me?

Brother: Of course.

Miss Books: and they are secretly married in a church.

Brother: Probably in Verona?

Merry-man: No, in a church.

Miss Books: All right, in Verona.

Chemist: I declare you a husband and a wife!

Brother: I’m the husband.

Chemist: Take it easy, man. I declare you a husband and a wife!

Heckler: My dear lady…Oh, I see. I am not a fool. You and you.

Miss Books: Yes, me and him.

Heckler: I will kill you.

Miss Books: No, that’s my husband. Cezario.

Brother: My name is Sebastian.

Heckler: Your husband?!

Sister: No, my lord. She became a bit mad.

Heckler: You’re gonna go far, kid.

Little Spitfire: Oh, my God. I become a bit mad. There are two of them.

Sister: Aaa, that is just my brother.

Brother: Go to Mum, and tell about something I did.

Chemist and Merry-man: Hhhhhhh

Sister: My dear brother! Sebastian!

Brother: My sweetest sister! Viola!

Heckler: Marry me.

Sister: With pleasure.

Chemist: Viola reveals her disguise and marries Duke Orsino. I declare you a husband and a wife! I declare you a husband and a wife! I declare you a husband and a wife!

Merry-man: This is the happy end.

MACBETH

Heckler: Is there any interesting story here? Now I am the author.

Heckler и Bully: And we also have a story.

Bully: Macbeth.

Heckler: Our play opens with thunder and lightning.

Bully: Oh, the Three Witches one, two, three says to Macbeth that he will be a king.

Merry-maker: I am the king.

Heckler: No, I am the king.

Little Spitfire: But he becomes a bit mad.

Miss Books: And began to kill everybody.

Heckler: King Dunkan, his guards, his friend Banquo, everybody!

Sister: And what about his wife. Lady Macbeth.

Heckler: By yourself, dear. No one born of a woman shall be able to harm me. Hey, who are you?

Brother: Macduff. I am not born by a woman.

Heckler: What?

Chemist: Caesarean section.

Brother: Goodbye, Macbeth.

Miss Books: Take the book from them. Shame on you.

Everybody’s changing.

ROMEO&JULIET

Security: You are so callous.

Lovely: And hard-hearted.

Security: Let’s read something about love.

Everybody: Uhhhh

Lovely: Oh, this one is about love.

Security: Romeo&Juliet. Начинает играть любовная музыка.

Brother: Have a heart!

Merry-man: You must be joking.

Danila: Ok, перещелкивает музыку на более веселую.

Together: Oh! Better!

Security: The play, set in Verona, Italy, begins with

Heckler: a street brawl between Montague and Capulet. Who is with me?

Bully: Me.

Brother: Who is with me?

На сторону брата идут мисс букс, злючка и мери-мен и химик.

Heckler: Hey, who else is with me?

Переходит на сторону хулигана сестра и химик.

Lovely: They are sworn enemies.

Merry-man: This is Sparta.

Brother: No, this is Verona.

Merry-man: Ok. This is Verona.

Security: Stop that. And both families have children. Juliet. Ok, you will be Juliet.

Lovely: And Romeo. You will be Romeo.

Heckler: Ha-ha-ha, he is Romeo…

Bully: Romeo? Me? Are you serious?

Lovely: Without any doubts.

Bully: So I am Montague.

Together: Romeo Montague.

Bully: Romeo Montague. Let’s return to the brawl.

Merry-man: This is Verona.

Security: But Montague's son Romeo is not involved into quarrels.

Lovely: He is in depression. Because a girl named Rosaline does not love him.

Sister: Sorry, man, I don’t love you.

Security: But suddenly he meets Juliet. And they fall in love with each other.

Little Spitfire: Fall in love with him?

Bully: To fall in love with this witch?

Security: Oh, yes, and agree to be married.

Heckler: Agree to be married. I am sorry, man. Ha-ha-ha.

Bully: Crazy but I believe this time
Little Spitfire: Begging for sweet relief
Bully: A blessing in disguise
Security: Dying behind these tired eyes
Lovely: You've been losing sleep
Security: Please come to him tonight

Security: Hands on a miracle
Bully: I've got my Security: hands on a miracle
Little Spitfire: Believe it or not, Bully: hands on a miracle
And there ain't no way
That you'd take it away

Chemist: I declare you a husband and a wife.

Lovely: Oh, thank you, Friar Laurence.

Together: Friar Laurence. (в тоне Баптиста)

Chemist: I hope to reconcile the two families through their children's union.

Merry-man: Too much pink here. Make the story better.

Security: Ok. Перещелкивает музыку. Tybalt, Juliet’s cousin, challenges Romeo to a duel.

Bully: No, I refuse to fight.

Lovely: Probably Mercucio, his friend, is offended by Tybalt.

Heckler: No.

Security: Go, do something.

Merry-man: Mercucio is a wet-blanket.

Heckler: Tybalt, I am offended.

Bully: Oh, come on. He is my kinsman now.

Heckler: Quite.

Security: Mercutio is fatally wounded.

Heckler: What? A plague on both your houses.

Lovely: Then Romeo confronts and slays Tybalt.

Merry-man: What?

Lovely: Then Romeo confronts and slays Tybalt.

Merry-man: I will remember that.

Brother: Get away from Verona, and never return.

Juliet is heartbroken.

Security: Juliet, here you are.

Sofa: What’s this?

Chemist: It will put you in a deathlike coma for forty hours. I will send a message to Romeo, and you will be together.

Bully: Guys, what happened here? Juliette? Ha-ha-ha

Security: Romeo is heartbroken.

Bully: Oh, yes.

Chemist: Drink some poison. (тут все говорят ему выпить яд)

Sister: that is awful.

Sofa: Guys, what happened?

Chemist: Juliet, drink some poison…

Security: No, no, Juliet stabs herself with his dagger.

Security: You were alone before we met
Lovely: No more forlorn than one could get
Bully & Little Spitfire: How could we know we had found treasure
Security & Lovely: How sinister and how correct

Heckler and Merry-man: And it was
A leap of faith I could not take
A promise that I could not make
Security: A leap of faith you could not take
Lovely: A promise that you could not make

Everybody: Mi cenicero, mi cenicero
My ashtray heart
Mi corazón és cenicero

Little Spitfire: I tore the muscle from my chest
And used it to stub out cigarettes
I listened to your screams, it’s pleasure
Security & Lovely: And I watched the bed sheets turn blood red

Sister: "For never was a story of more woe Miss Books: Than this of Juliet and her Romeo."

A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’S DREAM

Heckler: Tell me why this story is better than Macbeth.

Miss Books: Well, it is about love.

Bully: I know the play about love.

Merry-man: Without Lucencio’s body on the stage?

Bully: Sure.

Sister: Are you sure?

Miss Books: Give them a chance.

Heckler: Oberon,

Brother: I am Sebastian.

Heckler: king of the fairies, and Titania, his queen, have come to the forest outside Athens.

Bully: And they have a quarrel.

Miss Books: That’s easy.

Brother: Because Titania is not an obedient wife.

Miss Books: And Oberon is not honest with Titania.

Brother: Puck!

Security: Here, my Lord.

Brother: How to punish this woman?

Heckler: The fairy queen.

Brother: The fairy queen.

Sister: I am the queen.

Lovely: No, you are Rosaline.

Chemist: Oberon, here you are.

Brother: What’s this?

Chemist: Magical juice.

Security: Drink some magical juice.

Chemist: No. Apply magical juice to the eyelids of a sleeping person. And this person, upon waking, falls in love with the first living thing he meets.

Brother: Thank you.

Ждут.

Sister: And when is she going to fall asleep?

Little Spitfire: Titania, would you like to fall asleep?

Miss Books: I can’t get to sleep.

Little Spitfire: Ay, you think about the implications?

Miss Books: Of diving in too deep…

Heckler: Sleep now!

Brother: The first one?

Security: This one? Brother: No. Chemist Д: This one? Brother: Oh, yes, this one. Take him.

Heckler: Titania, awake!

Miss Books: Oh, I love you baby, and if it’s quite all right,

I need you, baby,

To warm the lonely nights, I love you, baby, trust in me when I say.

Все вместе: Oh, pretty baby, don’t let me down, I pray,

Oh pretty baby, now that I’ve found you stay

And let me love you, baby, let me love you.

Sister: Most wonderful!

Merry-maker: That’s a good teasing!

Bully: Excellent!

Chemist: Sleep now!

Все засыпают, всем мажут веки.

Danila: Everybody, awake!

Все бегут в зал. Привод себе тех, в кого они влюблены.

Chemist: Take some drugs. It will cure you.

Miss Books: This is my viewer. I love him a lot.

Chemist: Viewers should sit in auditorium.

Brother: A good story.

Heckler: And a good book.

Merry-maker: William Shakespeare.

Chemist: Plays.

Miss Books: Don’t you know? We played Shakespeare.

Bully: I have guessed.

Sister: And do you know who is Shakespeare?

Little Spitfire: Who was

Sister: Who is

Security: An English poet,

Lovely: playwright

Chemist: and an actor,

Miss Books: widely regarded as both the greatest writer in the English language, and the world's pre-eminent dramatist.

Sister: His plays have been translated into every major living language

Merry-maker: and are performed more often than those of any other playwright.

Miss Books: How do you know?

Merry-maker: I have read it on the cover of the book.



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