HOW TO AVOID TRAVELING
(after G. Mikes)
Travel is the name of a modern disease, which started in the mid-fifties and is still spreading. The patient grows restless in the early spring and starts rushing about from one travel agency to another, collecting useless information about the places he doesn’t intend to visit. Then, he or usually she, will do a round of shops* and spend much more than he or she can afford. Finally in August, the patient will board a plane, a train, a bus or a car and go to foreign countries along with thousands of his fellow-countrymen, not because he is interested in or attracted by some place, nor because he can afford to go but simply because he cannot afford not to. The result is that in the summer months (and in the last few years during the winter season too) everybody is on the move**.
What is the aim of traveling? Each nationality has its own different one. The Americans want to take photographs of themselves in different places. The idea is simply to collect documentary proof that they have been there. The German travels to check up on his guidebooks. Why do the English travel? First, because their neighbor does. Secondly, they were taught that travel broadens the mind***. But mainly they travel to avoid foreigners. I know many English people who travel in groups, stay in hotels where even the staff is English, eat roast beef and Yorkshire pudding on Sunday and steak-and-kidney pies on weekdays, all over Europe. The main aim of the Englishman abroad is to meet people, I mean, of course, nice English people from the next door or from the next street. It is possible, however, that the mania for traveling is coming to an end. A Roman friend of mine told me: “I no longer travel at all. I stay here because I want to meet my friends from all over the world.” “What exactly do you mean?” I asked. “It is simple,” he explained. “Whenever I go to London my friend Smith is in Tokyo and Brown is in Sicily. If I go to Paris, my friends are either in London or in Spain. But if I stay in Rome all my friends, I’m sure, will turn up at one time or another****. The world means people to me. I stay here because I want to see the world. Besides, staying at home broadens the mind.”
Notes: *to do a round of shops – идти от одного магазина к другому, покупая что-либо
**to be on the move – путешествовать
***to broaden the mind – расширять кругозор
****at one time or another – раньше или позже
Ex.34. True or false? Correct the statements which do not correspond to the contents of text C.
1) Travel is the name of a modern disease, which started in the mid-forties. 2) People begin thinking about traveling in the early spring. 3) Preparing for the trip, he or she spends more than he or she can afford. 4) In November people board planes, trains, buses, subway or cars and go to foreign countries. 5) In summer everybody stay at home. 6) Each nationality has its own aim of traveling. 7) The Americans travel because they want to check up on their guidebooks. 8) The English travel abroad to avoid foreigners and to meet nice English people. 9) The German travels all over Europe to eat roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. 10) Staying at home broadens the mind.
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TEXT D
Have you ever read any English books in the original? The text given below is taken from the famous A. Christie’s story. Try to translate it, consulting a dictionary as little as possible.
FROM PADDINGTON
(after A. Christie)
Mrs. McGillicuddy was going along the platform, trying to catch up with the porter who was carrying her suitcase. Mrs. McGillicuddy was burdened with a large number of parcels; the result of a day’s Christmas shopping. Platform No 1 was rather crowded; people were rushing in several directions at once, to and from undergrounds, left-luggage offices, tea-rooms, enquiry offices, indicator boards, to the outside world.
Mrs. McGillicuddy and her parcels were buffeted to and fro, but she arrived at last at the entrance to Platform No 3 and deposited one parcel at her feet while she was looking her bag for the ticket that would enabled her to pass stern uniformed guardian at the gate.
At that moment, a loud voice burst into speech over her head. “The train standing at Platform 3” the voice told her, “is the 4.50 for Brackhampton, Milchester and Roxeter. Passengers for Brackhampton travel at the rear of the train. Passengers for Carvil change at Roxeter”. The voice shut itself off with a click and then reopened conversation by announcing the arrival at Platform No. 9 of the 4.00 from Birmingham.
Mrs. McGillicuddy found her ticket and presented it. The man clipped it, murmured: “On the right-rear portion.” Mrs. McGillicuddy found her porter outside the door of a third-class carriage. “Here you are, lady.” – “I’m traveling first-class,” said Mrs. McGillicuddy. “You didn’t say so,” grumbled the porter. He took the suitcase and marched with it to the adjoining coach. The 4.50 was almost empty, as the first-class passengers preferred either the faster morning express or the 6.40 with a dining car. Mrs. McGillicuddy handed the porter his tip, which he received with disappointment, considering it more suitable to third-class than to first-class travel. But Mrs. McGillicuddy, though prepared to spend money on comfortable travel after a night journey from the North and a day’s feverish shopping, was at no time an extravagant tipper.
She made herself comfortable on the plush cushions with a sigh and opened a magazine. Five minutes later, whistles blew, and the train started. Three minutes later she was asleep. She slept for forty minutes and awoke refreshed. It was quite dark now. “Serving last tea now,” said an attendant, opening the corridor door. But Mrs. McGillicuddy had already had tea at a large department store. She looked up at the rack where her various parcels reposed, with a pleased expression. Her satisfied gaze returned to the window; a train traveling in the opposite direction rushed by with a screech, making the windows rattle. The train passed through a station. Then it began suddenly to slow down, probably in obedience to a signal. For some minutes it crawled along, stopped; and then began to move forward again, gathering speed. For a time two trains ran parallel, now one gaining a little, now the other. Mrs. McGillicuddy looked from her window through the windows of the parallel carriages. Most of the blinds were down, but occasionally the passengers of the carriages were visible. The other train was not very full and there were many empty coaches. Suddenly in one of the compartments of the passing train Mrs. McGillicuddy saw a man. His hands were round the throat of a woman who faced him; he was slowly, remorselessly strangling her.
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